2 Day Drunken Guacamole

I am most certainly NOT an outdoorsy girl, an oddity here in this quaint little valley of the Appalcahias, for sure. But all of this snow that has blanketed my little town over the last few days has left even me with a raging case of cabin fever and longing for warm summer evenings when I can kick back with a refreshing beer and a bowl of my fave 2 Day Drunken Guacamole and watch fireflies flash their love songs to each other.

Wait, what?!  TWO DAYS?!?! To make guacamole?!!

I know, I know, but trruuussst me. That first day makes all the difference in this recipe. It's really only just a step or two of prep work. And it's ridic easy. Your fridge will do aaaaalll the work for you. Promise.

You will need:
2 medium to large avacados
1 small clove fresh garlic, finely chopped.
1/2 cup salsa of your choice, strained*
1 lime wedge*
1 bottle/can of beer of your choice(Coronoa is what i usually use)*

1 medium, non-metal bowl
coffee cup
knife
fork
mini chopper**

Day 1

Place slice of lime in a clean cup.  SLOWLY pour beer over lime in cup, just till it's covered.  Cover with plastic wrap or foil and store in fridge overnight. Day 1 DONE. See? Now was THAT so hard?

 Day 2

1/2 cup strained salsa (bc we just want the chunky veggies, no extra liquid) and fresh garlic goes into medium bowl. Stir and set aside.

Remove alcoholic lime wedge from fridge. Plop lime, skin and all (just no seeds)  and 1 Tablespoon of beer from the cup into mini food chopper. Pulse until lime is completely pulverized (I like to pulverize things, have you noticed that?).

 Add lime-beer mixture to salsa and stir. Set aside.

Slice avacados and pit them. Then spoon out the good stuff from the shell and plop into medium bowl with salsa and lime.  Mash all together and stir with the fork. Add more of the beer that the lime soaked in if guacamole is too thick, or a bit of the salsa juice. If you don't like your guacamole with avacado chunks (Are you CRAZY!?), you can always pulse it a few times in the food chopper a little at time to smooth it out before adding to the salsa mixutre. This may make your salsa a little less thick though.

Serve IMMEDIATELY with tortilla chips, beer.


*I'm straight up Appalachian, y'all so I don't waste a daggum thang. Either enjoy the rest of that frothy beer as refreshing beverage while preparing  the guac or pour into a baggie and freeze.  Add the beer that the lime soaked in to the same baggie the next day. This makes a great marinade for steak to be used in grilled fajitas! Which would go great with guacamole! :) Same for the strained salsa juice. Freeze and save it for later, or you could even just add it back to the jar it came from. OR OMG ADD IT TO A BLOODY MARY!
As for the lime, once you cut your one piece, juice the rest and, can you guess?, FREEZE it in a jar or baggie for later use. ORRR add it to the baggie of  alreday frozen beer and use it as a marinade now or freeze it and thaw later.

**If for some UNGODly reason you DON't have a  mini food chopper (seriously, the electric ones are, like, $10 at ANY store in the WORLD that sells kitchen supplies or small appliances), then just hand chop up the drunken lime wedge until it is in teeeny tiny pieces, skin and all, and then add the lime and tablespoon of beer separately to the bowl of salsa.

Sorry no pictures with this one, it's just not working! Will try to add later!